So you’ve been dating your girlfriend for a while, but you’re not sure
if you’re ready to take things to the next level and ask her to marry
you. But are you sure this is the right time? Are you sure if she’s the
right one? Popping the question is never easy, even for a guy who is
sure he wants to spend the rest of his life with the special lady in his
life.
If you are even a little bit unsure about whether or not you want your
girlfriend to be your wife, you need to ask yourself some basic
questions about if you are ready to go from boyfriend to husband:
Can you imagine your future together?
Here’s a little thought experiment to do. Where are you and your
girlfriend a year from now? How about in five years? Can you imagine
yourself with her a decade from now? Of course there’s no way to tell
what is going to happen in the future, but the fact that you can
envision years down the line with this person means that she is the kind
of person you can spend that much time with.
Can you live with what you don’t like about her?
Look, let’s be realistic: no matter who you decide to marry, there are
things that she is going to do that are going to bother you. They may
make you crazy now, but you may someday learn to ignore them, forget
about them, or even learn to enjoy them. But if there is something she
does that you can’t stand, that you have no wish to ever be a part of,
this may be a sign that the two of you shouldn’t make a lifelong
commitment to each other. On some level, you need to know what your own
tolerance level is like.
Are you ready to settle down?
If you have been with your girlfriend for any significant amount of time
you should be able to tell if you are ready to settle down or not. Do
you still have the urge to sleep with other people or run off to party
with your boys whenever they call you up in the middle of the night to
go hang out? If you want to be with other people more than with your
potential wife you probably aren’t ready to make a big life change yet.
If distractions like other women and partying don’t seem better than
being with your girlfriend, you are probably ready to settle down with
her.
Do you already think of each other as a family?
Becoming husband and wife means that the two of you are going to be part
of each others families, but it also means that the two of you are also
going to become a family of your own. Whether you’ll have the
stereotypical bad relationship with your in-laws or if you all get along
great, these relationships are going to change your life. A family is
created by sharing. If you know that your home is her home and her home
is yours, you are already part of the same family
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